Halloween is not my favorite holiday. Growing up, my family really didn't celebrate it. Mom and dad would drive us to our cousin's and grandparent's houses to trick or treat, but we never left the light on at our house. In fact, I can remember even once we were too old to go trick or treating, dad would always say, "Make sure we cut the light off, we don't want any trick or treaters". As I got older, I would drive to church on Halloween. I think I remember "trunk or treating" more so than any real trick or treating. Bottom line, I do not have much experience buying costumes or making my own.
In fact, this year will be the first time in a really long time I have dressed up. We are having a fall festival for work and our Regional Vice President has requested us to dress up if we could. She said we didn't have to, but really, who can say no to the Regional Vice President?
Seriously, right? I have to dress up.
So...
Jon and I went out last night to all the Halloween stores in search of a costume. One after the other the costumes were the same story....how can we make a normal costume be as skimpy and show as much skin as possible! I was appalled! When was the last time you had a nurse look like THIS? I bet there would be a lot more heart attacks in my PCP's office if they did! When I was reading Little Red Riding Hood, I certainly didn't picture THIS!
When did Halloween turn into a time and place for women to dress as sexy and slutty as they have always imagined to be? When did women let this happen? Has this always been going on and I just missed it because my parents sheltered me my whole life? I would love to hear everyone's thoughts on this.
Saturday, October 12, 2013
Tuesday, September 24, 2013
Dear Mom
It has been one year since my whole world changed.
I think about that day all the time. I didn't believe it really happened. It was a dream. I was numb.
Sometimes....
I still don't believe that it's real.
I think you are here. I want to call you. I want to hug you. I want to tell you about everything good..
...and everything hard.
I know that you would not want me sad, or crying. But I just can't help it, Mom.
When I see your picture, it makes me remember how life used to be. When good things happen, it makes me sad that my number one fan is not here to celebrate with me. When hard things happen, it makes me feel frustrated that the person who's advice I most admired and trusted is not there to give it to me.
And yet...
still, I go on.
At first, I could almost still smell you and hear your voice. I could see you.
But now...
as the days have passed, I feel like I am forgetting things.
Your smell.
Your laugh.
Your touch.
am I?
When you were here, you always said we were so much alike.
I hated that. It drove me nuts because who wants to be like their mother!
You were right though. We are just alike. It just took 30 years and you dying for me to know it. Maybe that is why this has been so hard.
You see, Mom, when you died, part of me died too.
the part of me that used to talk to you every single week
the part of me that wanted to make you so proud
the part of me that used to call you for advice
the part of me that loved Christmas shopping with you and dad
the part of me that hated you saying we were just alike
the part of me that wanted your approval for everything
the part of me that knew you were there to listen when no one else would
I miss you, mom.
Right before you died, do you remember how we celebrated my 29th birthday? You and dad came to Athens to visit us. I will never forget that day because it was the last time I saw you.
I had made a promise and determination to spend every minute before I turned 30 in Joy. God had laid it on my heart to start choosing Joy over circumstance because for the first time in my life, I realized that I only had a limited amount of time left. I really thought I could. I was determined. I was excited. I had a list of things I wanted to do. 29 was going to be fun and exciting and amazing.
But..
....God had a different plan.
In one moment, my entire life changed.
Completely.
I was stripped completely naked, robbed of everything in my life that was suppose to bring Joy and love and good. My world stopped.
and in some cases, my world turned backward.
I was in a painful, complicated, hurtful and awful place where I could not possibly find any Joy.
Why would God want me to be Joyful this year? Why would God take away what could have brought me Joy and replaced it with all sorts of bad. And hurt. How could I find Joy in everything now.
except...
except through something greater
except through God.
Everything had changed except the One constant. The One who is Joy. And Love.
All I wanted for my birthday was Joy and despite all the hurt and pain and difficulty of this season I have went through, I did accomplish my purpose.
You see, it has been in the presence of God that I found my greatest Joy. I have spent more time over the past 365 days in fellowship with Him than I ever did before. I have come to know God better and feel closer to Him in spite of the circumstances in my life.
Your death gave me true life.
Why?
Because when all of this happened, I turned to Him.
I begged Him to save you
I cursed Him for taking you
I questioned Him for the reason why
I turned back to Him to find healing
I thanked Him for the time with you
I put my hope in Him to see you again one day
You didn't know then, and neither did I, but that last day we spent together was perfect. A final gift from God.
It was exactly what I wanted.
It was exactly what God knew I needed.
A while back, I wrote a blog about how I felt like God had me in a season of hard, and how I was looking forward to a new season in life.
Right now, I do think I'm here in a better season.
...But your are still there.
In my mind, you are still part of that season of hurt and hard.
But really though, I know you are no where near hurt and hard. You didn't move with me into this new season because you were received into Heaven for an eternal season of Joy!
Mom, I want you to know that one year later, I am doing okay.
Life is hard. Really, hard. But not all the time.
we have a wonderful church and church family that I know God purposely and specifically gave us. i have the job of my dreams and you would be so proud of me. we now live where you can see the stars every night. there is so much Joy!
even so..
somedays are better than others
some days I still cry
I want you to know, that although I miss you terribly and, quite frankly, sometimes I really long for you to be here with us, but really, I don't wish you were back here. You are in a far better place than I am. And no matter what part of you I miss or what part of me died when you passed, I would never, ever say that I wish you were still alive.
You made it, Mom.
You taught me that Life does not end here. This is only the beginning. And what is on the other side is so amazing, that it is worth every bit of the pain and hurt and hard that we will go through here.
You made it mom.
I am so happy for you.
I'll see you soon.
My brethren, count it all Joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. James 1: 2-3
For I consider that the suffering of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us. Romans 8:18
I think about that day all the time. I didn't believe it really happened. It was a dream. I was numb.
Sometimes....
I still don't believe that it's real.
I think you are here. I want to call you. I want to hug you. I want to tell you about everything good..
...and everything hard.
I know that you would not want me sad, or crying. But I just can't help it, Mom.
When I see your picture, it makes me remember how life used to be. When good things happen, it makes me sad that my number one fan is not here to celebrate with me. When hard things happen, it makes me feel frustrated that the person who's advice I most admired and trusted is not there to give it to me.
And yet...
still, I go on.
At first, I could almost still smell you and hear your voice. I could see you.
But now...
as the days have passed, I feel like I am forgetting things.
Your smell.
Your laugh.
Your touch.
am I?
When you were here, you always said we were so much alike.
I hated that. It drove me nuts because who wants to be like their mother!
You were right though. We are just alike. It just took 30 years and you dying for me to know it. Maybe that is why this has been so hard.
You see, Mom, when you died, part of me died too.
the part of me that used to talk to you every single week
the part of me that wanted to make you so proud
the part of me that used to call you for advice
the part of me that loved Christmas shopping with you and dad
the part of me that hated you saying we were just alike
the part of me that wanted your approval for everything
the part of me that knew you were there to listen when no one else would
I miss you, mom.
Right before you died, do you remember how we celebrated my 29th birthday? You and dad came to Athens to visit us. I will never forget that day because it was the last time I saw you.
I had made a promise and determination to spend every minute before I turned 30 in Joy. God had laid it on my heart to start choosing Joy over circumstance because for the first time in my life, I realized that I only had a limited amount of time left. I really thought I could. I was determined. I was excited. I had a list of things I wanted to do. 29 was going to be fun and exciting and amazing.
But..
....God had a different plan.
In one moment, my entire life changed.
Completely.
I was stripped completely naked, robbed of everything in my life that was suppose to bring Joy and love and good. My world stopped.
and in some cases, my world turned backward.
I was in a painful, complicated, hurtful and awful place where I could not possibly find any Joy.
Why would God want me to be Joyful this year? Why would God take away what could have brought me Joy and replaced it with all sorts of bad. And hurt. How could I find Joy in everything now.
except...
except through something greater
except through God.
Everything had changed except the One constant. The One who is Joy. And Love.
All I wanted for my birthday was Joy and despite all the hurt and pain and difficulty of this season I have went through, I did accomplish my purpose.
You see, it has been in the presence of God that I found my greatest Joy. I have spent more time over the past 365 days in fellowship with Him than I ever did before. I have come to know God better and feel closer to Him in spite of the circumstances in my life.
Your death gave me true life.
Why?
Because when all of this happened, I turned to Him.
I begged Him to save you
I cursed Him for taking you
I questioned Him for the reason why
I turned back to Him to find healing
I thanked Him for the time with you
I put my hope in Him to see you again one day
You didn't know then, and neither did I, but that last day we spent together was perfect. A final gift from God.
It was exactly what I wanted.
It was exactly what God knew I needed.
A while back, I wrote a blog about how I felt like God had me in a season of hard, and how I was looking forward to a new season in life.
Right now, I do think I'm here in a better season.
...But your are still there.
In my mind, you are still part of that season of hurt and hard.
But really though, I know you are no where near hurt and hard. You didn't move with me into this new season because you were received into Heaven for an eternal season of Joy!
Mom, I want you to know that one year later, I am doing okay.
Life is hard. Really, hard. But not all the time.
we have a wonderful church and church family that I know God purposely and specifically gave us. i have the job of my dreams and you would be so proud of me. we now live where you can see the stars every night. there is so much Joy!
even so..
somedays are better than others
some days I still cry
I want you to know, that although I miss you terribly and, quite frankly, sometimes I really long for you to be here with us, but really, I don't wish you were back here. You are in a far better place than I am. And no matter what part of you I miss or what part of me died when you passed, I would never, ever say that I wish you were still alive.
You made it, Mom.
You taught me that Life does not end here. This is only the beginning. And what is on the other side is so amazing, that it is worth every bit of the pain and hurt and hard that we will go through here.
You made it mom.
I am so happy for you.
I'll see you soon.
My brethren, count it all Joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. James 1: 2-3
For I consider that the suffering of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us. Romans 8:18
Saturday, June 8, 2013
its been a hard week
after mom died, everyone told me there would be good weeks and bad weeks. this has been a bad week.
i don't know if it has been because I have been so busy with work. or maybe because we have a contract on our house and we are busy with packing up and fixing things the buyers wanted fixed. part of it could even be that i don't have my number one fan to celebrate all of the exciting things happening in my life. maybe it is because one of my absolute favorite patients at work died this week. maybe all the stress. i just don't know.
whatever the cause, this week has been hard. i have found myself thinking about her all the time.
like every moment in every hour of every day kind of all the time.
i have cried everyday. waterfalls.
i have prayed every night for God to just let me dream about her. i have asked Him to tell her things. i have begged Him to let me know that she can see me or hear me.
i feel like this is a step back in the healing process.
maybe.
probably not.
i have known from day one that this was going to be painful for a really long time. i just didn't expect it to sneak up on me this week.
please do this for me today:
pray for me
if you still have your mom, go talk with her about what it was like when she lost her mom. i was a child and did not understand the pain that my mom probably felt. i never asked her how she felt. i wish i had.
Wednesday, March 27, 2013
I need to vent
I need to vent a little. Now before you continue reading on, I want to make something clear. This is my blog and my opinion. If you do not agree with what I say, then please move on to someone else's blog. I do not comment negatively on your blog or your Facebook page, please give me the same courtesy.
Yesterday a lot of people on FB changed their profile picture to a equal symbol in red. They did this in support of Homosexuals having equal rights in Marriage. While I applaud the idea of making a stance and fighting for what you believe in, I was appalled at the the number of people who say they are Christians who also support this stance.
I believe that the Bible plainly states that homosexual relations are wrong.
Corinthians 6:9-10 – “Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God.”
Romans 1:26-27 – “Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural relations for unnatural ones. In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed indecent acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their perversion.”
I believe there is essentially no difference between committing the sin of homosexuality or adultery.
Or lying. Or murder. Or stealing. I believe that we cannot and should not judge sin, but know that sin is sin and it is all evil.
I believe that Jesus says we should love one another no matter what and above all sin.
I do not believe that when Jesus says to love one another above all sins that he is also saying then that it is okay to sin. There is a huge difference.
In John 8, Jesus meets a woman who was caught in adultery. The Pharisees tested Jesus saying the law of Moses says to stone her. Jesus responds by saying, "let the one who has never sinned throw the first stone". Jesus continues to say, "Where are your accusers? Didn't even one of them condemn you?" No Lord, she said. And Jesus said, "Neither do I. Go and sin no more".
Jesus plainly says, "Go and sin no more". I forgive you of your sins. Go on with your life and stop your adultery.
I believe that we should and do love all people, including homosexuals. But homosexuality is a sin and should not continue. Adultery is a sin and should not continue. Murder is a sin and should not continue. Lying is a sin and should not continue. Stealing is a sin and should not continue.
That is why I do not support homosexuality in marriage. I will not support a sin.
This is why I do not support adultery in a marriage. I will not support a sin.
This is why I do not support murder for love. I will not support a sin.
This is why I do not support lying in a marriage. I will not support a sin.
This is why I do nots support stealing in a marriage. I will not support a sin.
I will not support that which is opposite to God.
There are many places in the Bible where God refers to man and woman uniting in Marriage as good.
Yesterday a lot of people on FB changed their profile picture to a equal symbol in red. They did this in support of Homosexuals having equal rights in Marriage. While I applaud the idea of making a stance and fighting for what you believe in, I was appalled at the the number of people who say they are Christians who also support this stance.
I believe that the Bible plainly states that homosexual relations are wrong.
Corinthians 6:9-10 – “Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God.”
Romans 1:26-27 – “Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural relations for unnatural ones. In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed indecent acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their perversion.”
I believe there is essentially no difference between committing the sin of homosexuality or adultery.
Or lying. Or murder. Or stealing. I believe that we cannot and should not judge sin, but know that sin is sin and it is all evil.
I believe that Jesus says we should love one another no matter what and above all sin.
I do not believe that when Jesus says to love one another above all sins that he is also saying then that it is okay to sin. There is a huge difference.
In John 8, Jesus meets a woman who was caught in adultery. The Pharisees tested Jesus saying the law of Moses says to stone her. Jesus responds by saying, "let the one who has never sinned throw the first stone". Jesus continues to say, "Where are your accusers? Didn't even one of them condemn you?" No Lord, she said. And Jesus said, "Neither do I. Go and sin no more".
Jesus plainly says, "Go and sin no more". I forgive you of your sins. Go on with your life and stop your adultery.
I believe that we should and do love all people, including homosexuals. But homosexuality is a sin and should not continue. Adultery is a sin and should not continue. Murder is a sin and should not continue. Lying is a sin and should not continue. Stealing is a sin and should not continue.
That is why I do not support homosexuality in marriage. I will not support a sin.
This is why I do not support adultery in a marriage. I will not support a sin.
This is why I do not support murder for love. I will not support a sin.
This is why I do not support lying in a marriage. I will not support a sin.
This is why I do nots support stealing in a marriage. I will not support a sin.
I will not support that which is opposite to God.
There are many places in the Bible where God refers to man and woman uniting in Marriage as good.
Matt 19 : 4 - 6
Mark 10 - 6 - 9
There is no place in the Bible where God refers to homosexuality as good.
I think what hurts the most is for someone on Facebook to say that I am a hater because I disagree with homosexuality. How is that hate? I also disagree with a man have sex with a child. I am sure you do too. Which one is hate? The only difference between what you call hate and what I just compared, is a few years in age.
a few years.
could be one year if the child is 17.
I do not hate homosexuals. I love them the same way a mother loves her child who has done something wrong. She loves her baby in spite of the sin. But as a parent, she would not not say to her child, continue sining, its okay. She would say, I forgive you. Go and sin no more.
How can Christians see it is a sin written plainly in their Bible, but say they are okay with it? I do not understand this. You cannot pick parts of the Bible to support. Whatever you believe the only important thing is to believe in Jesus. All Born again Christians no matter what side you support will see Paradise. A homosexual who is saved, can also see Paradise.
If you disagree with me, that is fine, but do not say mean things. I will delete it and block you from my page forever Mr. you should love and support everyone's beliefs.
Saturday, March 23, 2013
Holy Week
Tomorrow marks the beginning of Holy Week/Passion week. It starts on the Sunday before Easter, and ends on Easter Sunday. This is the last week of Lent.
When I decided to fast from something for Lent, in my heart I just wanted to see if I could even do it. You see, I can't recall ever fasting from anything. Ever. Like in my entire life ever. I always admired friends who were Catholic that fasted during Lent. I thought it was just so awesome to be willing to give up something in honor of the Lord. Little did I know then how much of a blessing this would bring me over the past few weeks.
I gave up all desserts and sweets. That's right, no candy, no chocolate, no jolly ranchers, no pudding snack, not even one single girl scout cookie (and that's been hard seeing as how the two boxes I bought have been staring right back at me every single time I open the pantry). I have not touched one sweet item since before February 13th.
At first it was hard. Really hard. Valentines Day was probably the hardest week of all with candy and chocolates floating around everywhere. But after weeks passed it was a little easier. You see, every time I craved a sweet, I would immediately ask God for His help and will power to resist the temptation. And....He did help me.
He helped me the same way all those years ago He saved us all from death. This week marks the week leading up to Jesus's betrayal and death on the Cross. Its a very sad week in one sense. Jesus was crucified in the most horrific way possible being nailed to a cross. He was mocked. He was laughed at. He was stoned. He was beaten. He was betrayed. And then He died.
But in another sense, this is a perfectly beautiful and joyful week. He rose from the grave after 3 days. He took upon my sins so that I am justified in Him and likewise will live eternally. He defeated death. He completed God's plan and purpose. He died for my salvation. Pure Joy.
Jesus is the ultimate gift. Take time this week to reflect on what He did for you in that tomb.
When I decided to fast from something for Lent, in my heart I just wanted to see if I could even do it. You see, I can't recall ever fasting from anything. Ever. Like in my entire life ever. I always admired friends who were Catholic that fasted during Lent. I thought it was just so awesome to be willing to give up something in honor of the Lord. Little did I know then how much of a blessing this would bring me over the past few weeks.
I gave up all desserts and sweets. That's right, no candy, no chocolate, no jolly ranchers, no pudding snack, not even one single girl scout cookie (and that's been hard seeing as how the two boxes I bought have been staring right back at me every single time I open the pantry). I have not touched one sweet item since before February 13th.
At first it was hard. Really hard. Valentines Day was probably the hardest week of all with candy and chocolates floating around everywhere. But after weeks passed it was a little easier. You see, every time I craved a sweet, I would immediately ask God for His help and will power to resist the temptation. And....He did help me.
He helped me the same way all those years ago He saved us all from death. This week marks the week leading up to Jesus's betrayal and death on the Cross. Its a very sad week in one sense. Jesus was crucified in the most horrific way possible being nailed to a cross. He was mocked. He was laughed at. He was stoned. He was beaten. He was betrayed. And then He died.
But in another sense, this is a perfectly beautiful and joyful week. He rose from the grave after 3 days. He took upon my sins so that I am justified in Him and likewise will live eternally. He defeated death. He completed God's plan and purpose. He died for my salvation. Pure Joy.
Jesus is the ultimate gift. Take time this week to reflect on what He did for you in that tomb.
Sunday, March 17, 2013
And so our story begins
This has been one of those incredible weeks that I will never forget for the rest of my life. You know what I mean...there are sometimes weeks that are really incredible. I'm not talking about good weeks and bad weeks, or even some great weeks, I'm talking about this week being one of those life changing weeks that we will always remember and talk about. This week will always be part of our story.
So what was so amazing about this week, you ask?
Well...
Remember when I told you that we had a dream to live away from the city, away from the hustle and bustle, away from the noise. A place with acres of land. A place where you could go to sleep to crickets. A place where our children could run, and play, and build tree houses, and forts, and maybe even rock cities. A place where you could smell the grass and the dew on a cool April morning.
A place you can see the stars...
Well, we did it!
This week is the beginning of our dream. This is our story.
Praise the Lord!
So what was so amazing about this week, you ask?
Well...
Remember when I told you that we had a dream to live away from the city, away from the hustle and bustle, away from the noise. A place with acres of land. A place where you could go to sleep to crickets. A place where our children could run, and play, and build tree houses, and forts, and maybe even rock cities. A place where you could smell the grass and the dew on a cool April morning.
A place you can see the stars...
Well, we did it!
This week is the beginning of our dream. This is our story.
Praise the Lord!
Saturday, February 16, 2013
To everything...Turn, Turn, Turn
I believe that we all go through seasons in life. Perhaps this particularly hard season I am currently in is coming to a close.
...or perhaps not.
God knows.
Today I was reading about Joseph and his life. He also had very clear seasons of prosperity and seasons of trouble. God had a specific plan for him.
If you don't remember Joseph's story, here is a quick recap: His brothers hated him and sold him to the Ishmalites. Then Pharaoh purchased him, but amidst this, the Lord was with Joseph and he was very prosperous. Pharaoh saw his prosperity and made him the overseer of his house. One day, one of Pharaohs wives came and tempted Joseph. Joseph, being a good man, denied her. But she went and told Pharaoh a lie and said that Joseph tried to have her. So Joseph was thrown into prison. Some time after, Joseph interpreted Pharaoh's dreams and because of this Joseph was again made leader over Pharaoh's house and all of Egypt.
When I read these chapters about Joseph, I think of my life. I am going through a particularly hard season right now. My prayer is that this season is coming to a close.
In Ecclesiastes 3:1, God says,
"To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under heaven".
In Joseph's own life, he had years of trouble. He was sold by his own brothers and made a lier by Pharaoh's wife and thrown into prison.
And he had years of prosperity...He was favored by his father Jacob and when with Pharaoh, he was made the leader over the house and Egypt.
Joseph interpreted Pharaoh's dreams to mean that Egypt would have 7 years of prosperity and 7 years of famine. Two drastically opposite seasons.
Why do you think God allows us seasons of trouble?
I think that God has a message of compassion and unity. God wants us to turn to Him, because when everything around us is failing, He is the only one who is not.
Jesus says, "When I was hungry, You gave me food, I was thirsty,
You gave me drink, I was a stranger, and You took me in"
Matthew 25:35
To me, the part of Joseph's story that stands out above everything is that the Lord was with Joseph.
"The Lord was with Joseph, and he was a successful man"
Genesis 39:2
"And he was there in the prison. But the Lord was with Joseph and showed him mercy"
Genesis 39:20-21
The Lord was with Joseph during the good and bad. He is always with us. He wants us to turn to Him during seasons of pain and seasons of joy.
He shows mercy and compassion.
He shows grace.
God is Love.
Sunday, February 10, 2013
Feeling like Job
Some of you might remember when I turned 29 I was determined to make this year the best year of my life. I am absolutely dreading 30, and I really wanted this last year to be unbelievable - filled with pure Joy and happiness.
God had a different plan.
This past year and a half has literally been the hardest of my entire life. In October of 2011, my father's business burned down. Every single memory we had in that building was gone in a better of minutes. Not to long after that, in June 2012, my Uncle Jeff passed away very unexpectedly. In July, our oldest great dane, Cooper Dooper Sheeler went into congestive heart failure and went to doggie heaven. In September, my mom had a massive heart attack and also passed away. And now, my grandfather has just passed.
Honestly, I feel like Job.
Do you remember his story?
Job chapter one pretty much sums up what happened. Job was a God fearing man that lived a "blameless and upright" life. God had blessed him greatly for he was prosperous with large herds, 7 sons and 3 daughters, and servants. One day Satan came to God from walking to and fro on the Earth. Satan tells God that Job is only righteous because God has put a hedge around him and his household. Satan believed that Job would curse God if He were to strike down everything he had. So God let Satan have power over Job and his household. He could do anything except lay a hand on Job himself. So Satan wipes out basically everything Job has - his herds of animals, his servants, and even his entire lineage (all 10 children). When Job finds out that everything he had was gone in just an instant, he does was most people (including me) would never do. He tore his robe, shaved his head, and worshiped.
He worshiped.
During the most difficult time in his life, he worshiped God instead of blaming Him, questioning Him, or even cursing Him. He worshiped.
Its hard. Its hard to understand why God lets bad things happen to people, and especially hard to worship God in a time of distress.
On my way to 365 days of Joy, I have found that...
It is not easy to be Joyful every day.
Prayer is your best friend.
The Bible will give you answers.
Joy can be found in every single situation, including bad situations.
God's plans are better than your own plans.
Today I am Joyful for life. God gave me and everyone I love, Life.
Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked I shall return.
The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away,
Blessed be the name of the Lord. -Job 1:21
Sunday, January 27, 2013
the new normal
One of the most amazing aspects of being a believer is when God sends other believers into your life for you to share your life with. These are those folks that are crazy for Jesus the same way you are. You don't get funny stares from them when you talk about chatting it up with Lord. You don't get mean comments when you choose to live a life of purity and sacred morals. You don't get a disappointed look from them when you stand up to things the world says is okay, but Jesus says is not. You don't get judgement when you fail to be the person that God intended you to be. And you don't have to hide it with a lie when you fail.
What you do get is grace. intention. love.
and Joy.
It is rare when these people come along. One in a Million, you might say.
We live in a world where being a believer is NOT normal. Following God's word down to the tiniest detail is not something that the majority of the folks I know even care to do. In fact, most of the folks I know are the type people that try to be good, try to love everyone, and try to be normal.
I don't think anywhere in the Bible God says that being normal is what we should be.
In fact...
In 1 John 3:13, "Do not be surprised, brothers, if the world hates you."
So when you find a church, a family, a couple - any group of people who are totally in love with God like you are, people who are 100% committed to living a life of upstanding morals, people that know without a shadow of a doubt that they will face persecution, people who are not just blending in with the crowd - when you find this, you want to celebrate.
it is so amazing. Say, Cloud 9?
I'm celebrating today.
What you do get is grace. intention. love.
and Joy.
It is rare when these people come along. One in a Million, you might say.
We live in a world where being a believer is NOT normal. Following God's word down to the tiniest detail is not something that the majority of the folks I know even care to do. In fact, most of the folks I know are the type people that try to be good, try to love everyone, and try to be normal.
I don't think anywhere in the Bible God says that being normal is what we should be.
In fact...
In 1 John 3:13, "Do not be surprised, brothers, if the world hates you."
So when you find a church, a family, a couple - any group of people who are totally in love with God like you are, people who are 100% committed to living a life of upstanding morals, people that know without a shadow of a doubt that they will face persecution, people who are not just blending in with the crowd - when you find this, you want to celebrate.
it is so amazing. Say, Cloud 9?
I'm celebrating today.
Saturday, January 19, 2013
Reading list 2013
Anything : The prayer that unlocked my soul - Jennie Allen
The Hunger Games : 1, 2, and 3
The Last Sin Eater - Francine Rivers
As silver refined - Kay Arthur
Maybe read: Stepping Up: A Call to courageous manhood - Dennie Rainey (this one I would read because I want Jon to read it).
The Hunger Games : 1, 2, and 3
The Last Sin Eater - Francine Rivers
As silver refined - Kay Arthur
Maybe read: Stepping Up: A Call to courageous manhood - Dennie Rainey (this one I would read because I want Jon to read it).
Our next MiSaDvEnTuRe awaits
One of the places Jon and I wanted to visit for like, FOREVER, is Yellowstone. We almost planned a trip out West last year, but instead opted to go to Miami for various reasons. But this year, we finally did it! We booked our campground in Yellowstone National Park this morning. Whoohoo! Let the countdown begin! (ehhh....8 long months to wait)
You know, I think the most wonderful part of any vacation is the planning. The organizing. The dreaming. The magic!
OF course I would say that.
If any of you know me, I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE to plan and organize. Give me an Excel spreadsheet and a few colorful highlighters, and somehow magic happens. I can turn a blank page into a treasure map of what, when, where, and how much. It is beautiful.
....it's also C.R.A.Z.Y.
C-R-A-Z-Y!
I am one of those looney bird planners that could plan each moment of my life down to the bathroom breaks. Don't worry, I do have some sense of self control. But don't you even doubt that deep inside I secretly wish I could make a spreadsheet for every single day.
What is quite funny though, is that no matter how much planning, preparing, and budgeting that I do, something always happens that I couldn't have planned for.
...A mishap.
...A mistake.
...A misadventure.
The Misadventures of Jon and Beth blog started because every vacation we go on something bad happens. Every single one. Either not getting sleep or getting sick or whatever, something always happens.
Let me give you a quick recap:
2004 - We returned from our honeymoon cruise only the find our brand new apartment home had flooded.
2005 - With our second attempt at cruising, returning home was much better than the cruise itself. We went on an excursion with a drunk driver who LITERALLY almost killed us. That is no exaggeration.
2006 - New York City was a blast except for the nights. Lets just say some people can snore so loud that you cannot sleep. It was bad. Really bad.
2008 - Our winter vacation to Colorado turned into a nightmare after we got T-boned in our rental car and Jon lost his license which meant we could not get back on the plane to Georgia.
2008 - The all inclusive trip to the Dominican Republic should have been the best 5 days of the year, until day 2 when I contracted a terrible bacterial infection from eating unclean food. I spent the rest of the time not eating anything. I guess all inclusive included the nasty bugs they carry there.
2010 - We tried cruising again only to be put into a room where a banging and clanking noise kept us up all night every single night. I don't remember sleeping ANY on that trip.
2011 - We traveled to Atlantis Paradise Island, but paradise turned into "not so nice" when they overbooked and had to put us up in a dump of a hotel for 2 days. Complaining gets you nowhere in the Bahamas.
2011 - September's cruise with our friends was great until Jon's face swelled up like a beach ball due to a saliva stone - not to mention the room we ended up with reeked of smoke. They had to use the Ozone machine every single day just to make it tolerable.
2012 - Miami went great except the drive down: flat tire, sleeping in the car at the rest stop because we could not find a hotel with vacancy, and then on the way home the truck started making horrible noises.
and so it begins....
Let me just tell you, I am in no way complaining. I know that we get to travel so much and things are bound to happen, but boy on boy, it just seems that we always end up with really bad luck. We must be the unluckiest couple in the history of ever! But it sure doesn't stop us from trying again.
Let the countdown begin. Yellowstone here we come!
You know, I think the most wonderful part of any vacation is the planning. The organizing. The dreaming. The magic!
OF course I would say that.
If any of you know me, I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE to plan and organize. Give me an Excel spreadsheet and a few colorful highlighters, and somehow magic happens. I can turn a blank page into a treasure map of what, when, where, and how much. It is beautiful.
....it's also C.R.A.Z.Y.
C-R-A-Z-Y!
I am one of those looney bird planners that could plan each moment of my life down to the bathroom breaks. Don't worry, I do have some sense of self control. But don't you even doubt that deep inside I secretly wish I could make a spreadsheet for every single day.
What is quite funny though, is that no matter how much planning, preparing, and budgeting that I do, something always happens that I couldn't have planned for.
...A mishap.
...A mistake.
...A misadventure.
The Misadventures of Jon and Beth blog started because every vacation we go on something bad happens. Every single one. Either not getting sleep or getting sick or whatever, something always happens.
Let me give you a quick recap:
2004 - We returned from our honeymoon cruise only the find our brand new apartment home had flooded.
2005 - With our second attempt at cruising, returning home was much better than the cruise itself. We went on an excursion with a drunk driver who LITERALLY almost killed us. That is no exaggeration.
2006 - New York City was a blast except for the nights. Lets just say some people can snore so loud that you cannot sleep. It was bad. Really bad.
2008 - Our winter vacation to Colorado turned into a nightmare after we got T-boned in our rental car and Jon lost his license which meant we could not get back on the plane to Georgia.
2008 - The all inclusive trip to the Dominican Republic should have been the best 5 days of the year, until day 2 when I contracted a terrible bacterial infection from eating unclean food. I spent the rest of the time not eating anything. I guess all inclusive included the nasty bugs they carry there.
2010 - We tried cruising again only to be put into a room where a banging and clanking noise kept us up all night every single night. I don't remember sleeping ANY on that trip.
2011 - We traveled to Atlantis Paradise Island, but paradise turned into "not so nice" when they overbooked and had to put us up in a dump of a hotel for 2 days. Complaining gets you nowhere in the Bahamas.
2011 - September's cruise with our friends was great until Jon's face swelled up like a beach ball due to a saliva stone - not to mention the room we ended up with reeked of smoke. They had to use the Ozone machine every single day just to make it tolerable.
2012 - Miami went great except the drive down: flat tire, sleeping in the car at the rest stop because we could not find a hotel with vacancy, and then on the way home the truck started making horrible noises.
and so it begins....
Let me just tell you, I am in no way complaining. I know that we get to travel so much and things are bound to happen, but boy on boy, it just seems that we always end up with really bad luck. We must be the unluckiest couple in the history of ever! But it sure doesn't stop us from trying again.
Let the countdown begin. Yellowstone here we come!
Sunday, January 6, 2013
How do you really know God?
My dad asked me a question a few weeks ago and I have been pondering it lately. He said, How do you know when God is speaking to you?
I guess the "preacher" answer is that God speaks in many ways. He speaks through the bible, your pastor, your Godly friends, your parents, prayer. I know personally I have found that God speaks to me through music. I hear God. You know, that tug-of-your-heart kinda feeling. Well, that's God.
I guess, though, there are many, many ways to hear God.
studying scripture
church
worship
your christian community
and, on and on....
But how do you really know God is speaking to you? What is that tug-of-your-heart kinda feeling.
Many people who go to church and pray and listen to music never really know Him. Some folks could pray all day long and feel as distant to the Lord as we are distant to the stars.
If you think about it, how do you really know anyone?
Time.
Experience.
Conversation.
Trust.
The only exercise that works 100% of the time to draw you close to God, is risk.
To willingly give your life to God, to place your future into His hands, and then sit back and watch Him come through.
And He does. He will.
Trust Him.
I guess the "preacher" answer is that God speaks in many ways. He speaks through the bible, your pastor, your Godly friends, your parents, prayer. I know personally I have found that God speaks to me through music. I hear God. You know, that tug-of-your-heart kinda feeling. Well, that's God.
I guess, though, there are many, many ways to hear God.
studying scripture
church
worship
your christian community
and, on and on....
But how do you really know God is speaking to you? What is that tug-of-your-heart kinda feeling.
Many people who go to church and pray and listen to music never really know Him. Some folks could pray all day long and feel as distant to the Lord as we are distant to the stars.
If you think about it, how do you really know anyone?
Time.
Experience.
Conversation.
Trust.
The only exercise that works 100% of the time to draw you close to God, is risk.
To willingly give your life to God, to place your future into His hands, and then sit back and watch Him come through.
And He does. He will.
Trust Him.
Saturday, January 5, 2013
A place you can see the stars
When I was a little girl, my dad and I used to go out back of our house, and lay on the ground. This was a place where you could see the stars.
It was quite and beautiful.
It was home.
As I grew up, my home changed from a college dorm room, to a teeny tiny apartment, to our first home after we married. None of which I could have called home. These were houses. Places that we stayed.
But not my home.
In the 8 years that Jon and I have been married, I have struggled with calling our houses, our home. They all just feel temporary.
My home...or least my dream of my home...would be away from the city, away from the hustle and bustle, away from the noise. A place with acres and acres of land. A place where you could go to sleep to crickets. A place where our children could run, and play, and build tree houses, and forts, and maybe even rock cities. A place where you could smell the grass and the dew on a cool April morning.
My home will be a place where you can see the stars.
and so...
I love finding good blogs. I found this one a while back and have been following her religiously since.
This is her story. This is almost our story.
Thistlewood Farm
We found it. We just have to find the courage to jump.
It was quite and beautiful.
It was home.
As I grew up, my home changed from a college dorm room, to a teeny tiny apartment, to our first home after we married. None of which I could have called home. These were houses. Places that we stayed.
But not my home.
In the 8 years that Jon and I have been married, I have struggled with calling our houses, our home. They all just feel temporary.
My home...or least my dream of my home...would be away from the city, away from the hustle and bustle, away from the noise. A place with acres and acres of land. A place where you could go to sleep to crickets. A place where our children could run, and play, and build tree houses, and forts, and maybe even rock cities. A place where you could smell the grass and the dew on a cool April morning.
My home will be a place where you can see the stars.
and so...
I love finding good blogs. I found this one a while back and have been following her religiously since.
This is her story. This is almost our story.
Thistlewood Farm
We found it. We just have to find the courage to jump.
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
Happy New Year!
Happy New Year everyone!
Did you make a New Years resolution this year? Maybe to exercise more or eat better? Maybe you resolved to be happy and joyful in every circumstance. Or perhaps, you resolved to just be a better person this year! All of those are wonderful, purposeful decisions, and if you can actually keep your resolution, then congratulations! You, my friend, are one of the few that actually do.
You know, every single year I make a resolution too. I resolve to do this or that, or loose this or that, eat this not that...and on and on. Every single year I resolve to "do" something. But just like the majority of us, every single year I fail. There I said it. I fail. Fail.
I have resolved to a routine exercise program starting January 1st for as long as I can remember. Usually sometimes between late February and early April I fissile out. Poof! I just stop. I get tired of it. I hate it. I dread it! D-R-E-A-D it! Who wants to exercise when there is so much more I could be doing that involves very little sweat! Ha-Ha!
But here I go again....This year, I have a new resolution. I have decide though, I am not going to talk about it or say what it is. I am not going to call it a resolution. I am not going to set myself up for failure like I do every year. My hope is that by not resolving to do something, but instead wanting to do something, that I will actually succeed. If you are wondering what it is, I'm not telling. I am not telling anyone. This year, my resolution is between me and God. He knows the desires of my heart. He knows how to help me accomplish my goals. He knows.
And let me tell you, isn't it great that God never fissile's out! Even when I do, He does not. He is successful. He is perfect. When I mess up, God extends his hands of grace to me. He forgives me. His Grace is sufficient for me.
Remember, no matter how many resolutions you fail or succeed at, there is only one resolution that has eternal consequences. And that resolution doesn't involving YOU doing anything.
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. – 2 Corinthians 12:8-9 (NIV)
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